How to Get Over the Fear of Getting Started

I wrote these Substack posts while holding on with the fear of not effectively conveying my message through words and worrying about being judged for my thoughts. Nine Substack posts later, I feel more confident in my writing, yet there's still a lingering sense of self-doubt.

Doing something new is a scary place to be in. Whether it's leaving your comfort zone, sharing your content online, or expressing your ideas on a platform where few might only notice due to their short attention spans.

Regardless of whether your way of thinking benefits them or not, the thought of being judged by your way of thinking is paralyzing.

However, it's important to recognize that this initial fear is entirely normal. It's a shared experience among all of us who loves to explore something new.

The good side of this is that we can overcome these obstacles by acknowledging these fears and understanding that we have the ability to move beyond this paralyzing phase.

In the following blocks of texts, we’ll dive into some of the reasons why we fear getting started and provide practical tips to help you take those baby steps towards pursuing what you love with less fear holding you back.

❓ What Causes These Feelings?

The fear of getting started stems from various factors, including:

1. Social Anxiety: This is characterized by an intense fear of being observed and judged by others, influencing how our actions that impact us socially.

2. Self-perception: This refers to a person’s view of themselves. It is our limiting beliefs and the weaknesses that makes us doubtful of our capabilities.

We also tend to overthink and try our best to make it perfect right at the start as to prevent ourselves from being rejected by the crowd that views our work. This anticipation often paralyzes us to do the thing. And as a result, we become vigilant, sensitive to the slightest hint of disapproval from those around us.

💡 The Truth: Fear is Normal. We're Human.

Fear is a natural thing to us humans, and there's a reason behind their existence. Evolution has shaped our way of handling fears in which our survival heavily relies on it the most.

Fear, as a vital response to physical and emotional danger, played a pivotal role throughout our evolutionary history, especially in ancient times when the stakes were high, and the death is just around the corner at all times

But in today's context, the stakes are lower.

Our modern-day fears, such as the fear of public speaking or fear of specific scenarios and objects, doesn’t scale up against the life-or-death dilemmas faced by the ones who were before us.

So, what's the significance of delving into this scientific aspect in these paragraphs?

It's my way of saying that experiencing fear is a normal response in the context of why we hesitate to get started.

Furthermore, understanding our fear of being rejected is also important. It enables us to question the anxiety that robs our confidence in getting started.

It’s no brainer to run away from a dangerous animal out of fear. but does that same fear serve a purpose when worrying about what your friends might think of your actions?

With this in mind, let's dig further into some steps that can help you to overcome the fear of getting started:

💪 How to Overcome the Fear of Getting Started

1. Accept the fear - Understand that the fear doesn’t go away permanently, and confronting it head-on is the only way forward. Acknowledging that this doesn’t go away forever is a normal part of the process and it helps you build your confidence to do the things that you are afraid of doing in the first place.

2. Small actions compound over time - The key to getting over that giant fear of doing something new is to reduce that activity to its lowest form. Start with the most straightforward version that feels easy for you, and gradually build momentum as you progress to more substantial aspects of the task.For example, if you want to begin journaling but find it very paralyzing when writing long paragraphs and what should you write on your journal, try documenting your day using bullet points with one-sentence summaries. Embrace the mundane details. While it may seem boring at first, after consistently jotting down these snippets for 30 days, you'll notice significant progress in your journaling, and eventually you’ll write longer form of journaling that suits your preferred style of writing.

1. No one really cares - Understand that people are busy with their own lives and they won’t actually care for a while. While some may notice what you do, others won't. Initial judgments may occur, and a lot of them will always have a say about things. Acknowledge the fact that whatever you publish online and the reaction of people is totally beyond your control. The metrics, the comments, the reactions, and other sentiments are out of your reach. Like I said, people move on with their lives, and they invest more time in their personal experiences.

2. Lower the bar and embrace the flaw - Fear of getting started often comes from setting unrealistically high expectations at the beginning. Combining the fear of failure, fear of social disapproval, and perfectionism can be paralyzing.We often compare ourselves to those accomplished and seasoned creators and set unrealistic high standards to ourselves. This is something that we must avoid as our mileage and their progress differs greatly.Acknowledge that it's okay to suck at first. Embracing this reality that we learn from our mistakes shifts your mindset to a growing mindset, where improvement happens gradually.Once you are good at doing the thing, you deserve to raise the bar. As long as you consistently do the thing you love, improvement happens. 

So why not give it a shot? Remember, the fear of getting started doesn't completely disappear. The key is to confront it, step out of your comfort zone, acknowledge your feelings, and take consistent actions along the way.

Strive for consistency despite overthinking and facing your fears. Embrace the journey from the start, and recognize that growth happens through continuous effort.

Have a great week!

ran xx

Thank you for reading Thursdays with Ran. This post is public so feel free to share it.

🗒️Journal Prompt (from Day One App)

🖌️ 🎶 Art and Music Corner

Here’s an artwork from the artist Potaco Poco

Music - Listen to these band’s banger music. Listen through until you get to the chorus where it goes upbeat! :)

Video - Here are 15 awesome books to read in 2024, courtesy of Ali Abdaal’s video

📘 Reader’s Delight

-Read Ayodeji’s article about how to write without boring people to death

-How I keep up with daily news (tech, international, etc) - Morning Brew

-My favorite note taking app

🖊️ Words to Live by

🙏 A small favor

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